Just a few guidelines I aspire to live by. There are not many of them, but they have helped me become the person who is getting me the life I always wanted to have.
1. Know What Matters
The only two things that matter in this life are a) your intellectual or creative output and b) how you treat people.
Create without fear or shame. Be prolific and don’t let perfection be the enemy of the good.
2. Have Manners
Having manners doesn’t mean saying your ‘pleases’ and ‘thank yous’. Those are basic courtesies.
Having manners means making people feel valuable, appreciated, respected and worthy of your time.
Treat people well for your own good. Often we notice when we’ve had bad service but when we often don’t notice when the service has been good. That’s what we expect. That’s normal.
Treating people badly is degrading to you not just the other person.
3. Have Strong Boundaries & Filters
Be kind, loving, honest and warm.
If there are toxic individuals who drag you down —or make it harder for you to be kind, loving, honest and warm — distance yourself from them as soon and as politely as possible.
Don’t compromise yourself. Don’t let yourself become a victim to users. Don’t become what you hate. Cut the cords that bind you to the unworthy.
4. Forgiveness Is For You
You don’t have to pardon wrongs against you but you should forgive those wrongs as soon as you feel you can. Not for the next life but for this life.
Being unforgiving rots the soul you have to live with right now. I know that this is easier said than done, but just remember that you are doing it for yourself.
Your forgiveness is for you.
5. Be Generous
Be generous and life will be generous back. It’s an attitude. Assume it and good fortune is yours.
When being generous, remember that your time is the most precious thing you have.
6. Say It
If you have nothing nice to say — don’t say it.
If you have something nice to say — do actually say it.
Other people aren’t mind-readers. You’ll be surprised what doesn’t go without saying.
7. Ask For What You Want
If you want something — sometimes all you have to do is ask.
Most people don’t get what they want because they are too afraid to ask as they think they’re undeserving.
This hang up can be easily resolved by acting in a way that means you always deserve what you want (see 1b and 6).